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Post by Charles Barkley on May 8, 2014 6:46:40 GMT
The General Manager of the Houston Rockets, Charles Barkley, called a press conference early Thursday morning. And it left most members of the Houston media completely baffled. In between the tears and the blubbering, Charles gave us quiet the quotes.
"...I was once told as a kid, 'If you love something, let it free, if it comes back you, its yours, and if it doesn't, it was never meant to be.' ...Bette Midler said it best" And this is where Charles got to singing, "Some say love, it is a river, that drowns the tender reed. Some say love, it is a razor, that leaves your soul to bleed." He then began crying inconsolably. His good friend and confidant, Kenny "The Jet" Smith, gave him a large embrace. Well, it really was more like a man hug, as Charles wept into his arms. It left most media members uncomfortable.
Charles went on, regrettably. "I just can't believe its over. But, I know it is something we had to do. It just wasn't working, we tried. But, in the end, we both knew it wouldn't work out. Hopefully, my little butterfly comes back to me. I've now set you free. It was the hardest thing I've had to do in my life, but it was the right thing. That's what I keep telling myself and will have to tell myself over these next few months as I wait up at night, wondering if it will ever be."
Every media member I spoke to is very confused. We are unsure as to what exactly happened, but it sounds like Charles just divorced his wife. Some say they saw him grief-eating and drinking at the local Cheese Cake Factory afterwards.
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Post by Charles Barkley on May 8, 2014 6:56:37 GMT
Alright, lower-level management has just informed the press of the following trade between the Houston Rockets and Indiana Pacers:
Houston Receives:
Giannis Antetokounmpo
Brandon Bass
Hasheen Thabeet
Indiana Receives:
Eric Bledsoe
Gerald Wallace
It is now clear that Sir Charles was talking about the highly coveted Eric Bledsoe in his presser early Thursday morning. One media member asked Charles about the trade at the Cheese Cake Factory he was drinking to forget at and he left us with this quote, "My Eric is gone." He then began to cry again.
We then gathered around Bledsoe's locker, he was wearing a black t-shirt with Charles' face on it. He then said, "Man, this team, these guys, they are my family. I love them. Me and Dipo, we are brothers. And D-Rose, he is like a big brother to me, showing me how its done. But, I mean, this is a business and I understand. I want to be here. So, we will see what happens. I love Charles, I love this city, and I love all of you." He then embraced Victor Oladipo and gave a man-hug to Derrick Rose. And went around the locker room shaking hands and shedding tears.
One thing is clear, the clouds over Houston may be gray now, and Charles is clearly dealing with some real issues, but, Charles seems like he is willing to pay the price to paint them white.
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